Listening, Learning, and Letting Grow: What Makes a Good Therapist
by Allison Fishler, LMSW | Psych Collective
If you ask me what makes a good therapist,
I don’t think it’s about having the right words.
It’s about knowing how to listen—
not to fix, not to label,
but to understand.
A good therapist listens without judgment.
They hold space for every version of you—
the parts you’re proud of,
and the ones you’re still learning to love.
They understand that you are the expert of your own life.
Therapy isn’t about taking your power away;
it’s about helping you remember you have it.
That’s why a good therapist allows autonomy in your healing process—
walking beside you, not leading from ahead.
They gently challenge your thinking when it keeps you stuck,
help you untangle cognitive distortions,
and reflect back the truths that get buried beneath old beliefs.
A good therapist personalizes every session—
no cookie-cutter care, no one-size-fits-all plan.
They meet you where you are,
because healing has no timeline.
Growth unfolds in its own time—
and a good therapist honors that rhythm.
Empathy and emotional intelligence are their compass.
They do their own therapy,
practice self-awareness,
and stay authentic—real humans,
not just professionals in a chair.
A good therapist promotes safety and trust.
They help you recognize the cognitive, emotional, and behavioral patterns
that quietly shape your life.
They explore trauma with gentleness and curiosity,
never rushing what needs tenderness.
They keep learning.
They stretch their skills and expand their tools
because you deserve care that grows with you.
They stay aware of their own biases,
treat everyone with respect,
and see success in every brave step you take—
no matter how small.
A good therapist validates your emotions,
helps you process what’s been too heavy to hold alone,
and celebrates the strength it takes
to show up, again and again.
Most of all,
a good therapist loves what they do.
They show up because they believe in people—
in you—
and in the quiet, extraordinary work of healing. 🌱
🌸 A Closing Reflection
Healing isn’t a straight line.
It’s a spiral of learning, unlearning, and remembering.
And a good therapist doesn’t rush that process—
they honor it,
trusting that real change happens
when compassion meets consistency.
—
Allison Fishler, LMSW
Psych Collective | Coeur d’Alene, Idaho
